Kids, kids, kids.

A: Mom, what's that?
B: That's a tablet PC.
A: Is it an i-Pad?
B: ?? How did you know about i-Pad?
A: My friend has it. He got it for his birthday.
B: Oh ok.
A: Can I have that for my birthday too, mom?
B: No, you can't, A. It's not good for your eyes.
A: But my friend has it and his eyes are ok.
B: Maybe now his eyes are OK, but many years later, his eyesight will be bad.
A: Why mom?
B: That's because the screen gives out radiation, which is bad for the eyes.
A: People must wear glasses when their eyes are bad?
B: Yeah.
A: So, you're wearing glasses because you use i-Pad too?
B: No, mom and dad don't have i-Pads. We don't need one.
A: But i-Pad is so popular now, mom. Friends will laugh at me if I don't have one. Can you buy one, please? Please?
B: OK. You get first place in your final exam, and I'll get you one, ok?

Does this sound familiar to you? Children are not only getting more techno-savvy, they're also getting much more inquisitive and smarter. They know how to weave their way around their parents to get what they want. In order to handle SuperKids like this, parents need to be more cautious when dealing with their kids' demands. The days where we stare at them in anger are gone. They're no longer afraid of us. We can't spank them, we can't scold them. We need to exercise plenty of patience and understanding as to what makes them tick, and that is no easy task.

Kids are indeed getting more difficult to handle, but not impossible.

New Kids

Don't be duped by the title. I'm not having a kid - maybe never will. :-)
What do these have in common?

• iPad
• iPod
• iPhone
• Blackberry
• tablet PC
• android

Well,  these are words that come out of the mouths of kids as young as 5-years-old these days. They know what these gadgets are, they could pronounce them well enough even before they go to kindergarten. Of course, their parents help them, or else they wouldn't know, would they?

Modern kids are techno-savvy, and that's because of the exposure they get when the eat out with their parents. In school, they see their friends play with these gadgets, so they would coax their parents to get one for them. Just ask a kid what they want for Christmas or for their birthdays. Chances are, they'd ask for a digital camera, a handphone or some latest techno stuff in the market. Presents like pencil boxes, school bags, books, Lego and Megablocks have lost their popularity years ago. DUH.... what? Yes, you can say that again.

Is there a way to keep them away from technology till they're old enough to handle them? The answer is a melancholic "No" because parents have to say "Yes" to their kids' demands; they don't want their kids to be left far behind. "No" has suddenly been excluded from the vocabulary of a child born in the 21st century. These are the TechnoKids who have their own Facebook accounts at a young age, and who could teach their ageing parents how this website works. These are the kids who know what a blog is, and own their own blogs.

So what if my kid asks for an iPad, you may ask. Well, they could have all the latest gadgets money can buy, but they'll lose out on finer things in life - like socializing with REAL people in REAL neighbourhoods; learn to be better citizens, and not be too materialistic. To those who could afford to equip their kids with these ridiculously expensive devices which interest the little ones for just a brief moment before these machines are replaced with newer models, well and good. What about those who can't? I have no answer for that. Personally, I'd rather go for moderation, taking the middle path.

We live in a scary world. It is getting scarier by the day. Children are at least 5x smarter than their parents, and are five times as quick to learn new things. Hopefully, this change would create a better world, not destroy it.

The Right Person - my foot!

"Life is not about finding the right person, but creating the right relationship; it's not how we care in the beginning, but how much we care till the very end." - Anonymous.

How many times have we heard people say:

• "I've found the right man."

• "I've not found the right person yet"

The irony is that, although they've finally found the "right" person, there's no guarantee that the relationship will work out just fine. How does one define "right"? Do we look at a person's physical attributes, their personality, or perhaps their wealth, educational level and social status? 

Personally, if you put too much criteria in looking for partner, then in due time, your relationship will go down the drain. Do you know why - because it's just a fallacy; we believe we've found the exact person that fits our criteria, and on that basis, we begin to supposedly care for them. Years (or months) down the road, you then realise that both of you don't seem to care that much anymore. You do things your way, they do things their way. You have tried hard to please your other half and to show that you cared, but you got nothing in return. Instead you took all the blame, you got shot down each time you made a mistake and you might even feel like you're a slave in your own home. You suddenly find yourself in a tight situation - being dominated by a domineering life partner, and feel like you've got yourself a monster. If you're in this situation, then it means you've got your math all wrong from the start.

The right person to be with is the person whom you can care FOR till the end of your life. It takes two to tango. You don't need an astrologer to tell you that. Two people might quarrel every other day but that doesn't necessary mean there's no care, or that you're both a mismatched couple. Arguments happen in the household when there are differences in opinions. Silence is not good. Having a dominating mate isn't an indication that no care would be given or expected either because no two humans are the same. Even twins are not really duplicates of each other. You might initially dislike a person, but over time, care can be displayed in discreet ways. The question is: Can you sustain the care that you give till the end of your lifespan if both of you intend to be together forever more? Can both hands eventually clap?

Charity Begins at Home

You see the piggy bank (picture below) and a stack of money beside it? I call it my Bamboo Bank. The money has been in the container for a few months already, and I've been waiting for the need to use that money. Well, I've just found that need. The contents of my Bamboo Bank will be given to the Japan Quake Relief Fund via World Vision (WV) which I'm a member. Too bad WV doesn't have a branch in little Malacca town, so I've to send a Money Order to its branch in Petaling Jaya instead.



My Bamboo Bank: A bit each day



The money in this container came from two sources. I placed the container on my desk, and I make it a point to put in either 20 sen or 50 sen each day I come to work. Yup, that's my own money. On top of that, 10% of the proceeds of my MUET tuition class goes into the Bamboo Bank too. So far I don't have any more students (sad), so there's nothing much to donate next time. The total amount that I'm sending to the relief fund is RM170.00 (approx. US$50), and that's enough to feed a small family simple meals for a few days.

Notice that the Bamboo Bank that you saw in the picture is specially made. It's made of recyclable material (cardboard and aluminum). This will be my permanent donation box. I got it from Tzu Chi when I attended training there last year. Well, I'm a very passive member... bad boy.

Teach your children to be charitable, but first you need to be charitable, too in order to be a good role model. If those in the lower economic status group could afford to put in small amounts into their own piggy banks each day, I don't see why those in the middle and upper classes can't do so. The Malay has this proverb: "Sedikit, sedikit, lama-lama jadi bukit." (Literally translated: Little by little, eventually it becomes a hill.)" - I'm sure you've heard of that. 

Note: Check out this article, written in 2006/07, before you leave my blog. It really makes you wonder...

Nuclear Programme in Malaysia?

For the past few days, news about the instability of the nuclear reactors in Japan dominated the headlines. The radiation, apparently, is spreading toward United States and Europe. To me, this is really critical. Let's hope for the best and continue praying for the victims.

While people are suffering because of the possibility of a massive nuclear blowout, Malaysia is thinking of having its own nuclear programme. I guess some people at the top think with their backsides. Our former Prime Minister, Dr Mahathir, was probably right when he said that we don't know much about nuclear and fission. Therefore, we can imply that it is not a good idea to have any kind of nuclear programme in this country.

We tend to believe that we will never be hit by natural calamities like tsunami or earthquake because this country is not located within the moving plates of the earth. We forgot that when tsunami struck Acheh a few years back, it hit Penang and some coastal areas too, though the impact wasn't great. We have to remember that the climate has changed, and no one is able to tell what's happening right under our homes.

Malaysia cannot emulate other countries in some areas. There's nothing to prove, but lots to lose if things go wrong. If you're agreeable to have a nuclear plant in Malaysia, then read this local news. If not, then welcome to the no-nuclear club.

On Disasters

Read the papers, listen to the news. What do we see? Sadness, anguish, fear. First it was the massive earthquake, then ferocious tsunami. Disaster has struck Japan real bad, and then the wave hit Hawaii and part of the U.S. Even China felt it. Now there's a threat that the nuclear reactor might be leaky, thus emitting radiation. If I remember correctly, only a few days back I read about a disease threat. Some of my friends are ill, having flu-like symptoms. What does all this mean? 

It means the climate and whatever that is under our feet are changing rapidly but we can't see it till tragedy happens. It also means that this is the time to do your part to help victims of such calamities. You can give financial, spiritual, emotional and physical support. This is the time for philanthropists to help rebuilt cities that have been destroyed, not just donate only to show that you're the founder of an organisation.

It also means you'll receive flyers and newsletters telling you that God is showing his wrath, so you must repent. Others would say it's a sign that Armageddon is near.  I say that you need not worry. The end of the world will come, but not in our lifetime, so please don't bother about what others tell you about 2012 - the year when the end of the world is said to occur. What you must do now is to pray for those in need of your prayers.

Malaysians are lucky not to have to go through this disaster. If our country were to have a disaster, it would be a political one where half-baked politicians incite hatred against the people using the race card as their weapon to retain power. We have seen what had happened (e.g.: calling Malaysian-born Chinese "immigrants", the cow head issue, using the word "Allah" in sermons & newsletters) and is still happening right now. They never will learn, so please vote them out in the next General Election. We used to be a harmonious nation; we don't need disastrous politicians that will do nothing but break this country apart as quickly as tsunami destroyed parts of Japan.

UPDATE:

A volcano, Mount Karangetang in Indonesia has erupted. It is located around Sulawesi.It happened hours after the tsunami in Japan (last week). I don't remember hearing about this in the news, did you?

Powerful Money

One of the issues that lead to marital breakdown is shortage of money. That's right. Couples argue about the lack of financial means to keep the family afloat. Bills have yet to be paid due to insufficient funds, some purchases need to be postponed and meals have to be cut down to only once or twice a day. I'm not pointing fingers at any particular reason, but one thing's for sure - if I'm not careful, I'd be in the same predicament though it will not reach melting point unless I get thrown out of the company I work for.

There is a saying: "Money is not everything; money is not the most important thing in the world."

While that is true, we need to be realistic. We don't wear dried leaves as our clothing or use stones as knives anymore, do we? The days of the Flintstones are long gone. We don't pluck copper coins from money trees. We have to earn every single penny to feed ourselves, and if we have a family, or intend to do so, we need to earn even more to cater to the needs of our wife and children (and parents/parents-in-law). Money is so important that without it, getting married is impossible. It is so vital that if you lose money through mismanagement of funds - not through foolishness like gambling - you'll might lose your loved ones.

In the family institution, men are always looked upon as the "Money God" as they are responsible for ensuring that everyone has their basic needs looked into - clothes, food, shelter and education. For this reason, it is my personal belief that even if a woman earns enough salary for the family, she would still dump her other half if he's out of job or can't seem to bring in additional funds so that the family could enjoy some extra comfort and entertainment. Of course, you cannot deny that there are non-working moms who could just depend on their husbands for financial support, and they both don't mind about it as there is mutual agreement;  there are also non-working dads in the same scenario, but how many are THAT fortunate?

The reality is, the minute you mention that you're running out of cash, your other half sees a red flag. If you're married, there will be discussions on how to improve your financial standing. If you're in a relationship, chances are, the other half would just give you a final kiss if the situation remains status quo, pack up the belongings and leave you for greener pastures.

That's how powerful money is...  so, if you're in financial distress, get some help - not from loan sharks, but from a professional fund manager, or if you cannot trust them, just discuss with your partner how to get over the financial difficulty. There will definitely be sacrifices that both of you (and your children) have to make, but unless you're born into a wealthy family, you have no choice.

I don't want to run out of money, I don't want to lose my loved one, and I don't want to be insane. Now let's see... where can I get part time job at this age, huh?