A Dream Traveller

In my entire life, the only other country that I've ever been was Singapore, and that was in my teens decades ago; the only place I travelled by flight was to Sarawak and back when I served there for 3 years as a teacher. I can conclude that in my entire life (till today), I've never actually stepped beyond Malaysia & Singapore while some lucky 10-year-old kid has been to Hong Kong Disneyland, and would be going to Australia end of this year. How I wish that kid was me instead.

I was never born a traveller. I dislike the inconvenience and the tiresome journey after spending hours on the airplane and in transit. Over the past 2 years, especially after my Big-D, friends and relatives have been advising me to get out of my comfort zone and see the world as I'm now a free man. I have been kind of reluctant when I thought of the air fare and the distance.

However, I've come to realise something. I won't live forever; now I'm blogging this post. Tomorrow, I may be gone six feet underground. Life is THAT fragile as we don't know when God will call us home. Before this happens, I am determined to travel though I'm not too sure if I'd do it alone, with a partner, or a group. For someone whose mouth contains tonnes of gold, I think it's wise to go in a group for a start. I'm not rich, despite what others think. Half my salary goes to paying fixed monthly debts, a huge chunk goes to the utility companies, while the rest ... well, I still need my necessities, don't I... leaving nothing much for travelling, and a negative bank balance if I did.

But I'm determined to travel at least once a year. Perhaps to Singapore once more to see the changes - not that I could remember much, anyway. Thereafter, I need to venture away from the little island and see what other continents have to offer. If you've not seen the world, you've read only a page of a book.

Right now, my cup of life is not even half full. I want to fill it up till it overflows if I can. I want to die a well-travelled person, touch the soil of other nations, taste new culinary delights, take snapshots of beautiful beaches and ancient architectures. It's not too late to start. Sounds like a dream? Maybe... maybe not. I think God is all merciful, and He won't take me away so soon. Touch wood!

Facebook is Great, or Is It?

Paul: Hi, I've not seen you in a long time. How have you been?
Pearl: I'm doing good, thanks. Been pretty busy with work actually.
Paul: Oh, really? I thought you've gone MIA.
Pearl: Nah, still here though it's not the best place to be. Look, I've got to run ok?
Paul: OK, sure. By the way, do you have a Facebook account? I'll add you in.
Pearl: That's great.

People, what has happened to the conservative way of exchanging business cards and telephone numbers? The former is purely for business interactions, no more for social relationships - except perhaps in Japan. Exchanging handphone numbers used to be the norm, but now we'd add in Facebook as well.

Just like the iPad fad, Facebooking has become too popular as well; it has become a social networking phenomenon the past few years. It's so easy to set up an account that even an 8-year-old (or younger) could create an account on his own, and I'm not exaggerating.

I've never delved much into Facebook until the past two years when I started connecting to friends, and I've been actively using it in recent months to communicate with my students and long-lost buddies (if they're still alive, that is). I've noticed that the Facebook administrators have been updating the site with more features which enable users to get connected even easier. However some new features actually expose unsuspecting users to newer threats. We are now concerned with not only privacy invasions and identity thefts, but also criminal acts like virtual stalking that could possibly lead to abduction. Yup, I'm talking about this craze of using a new feature known as "Check-in" where Facebook is able to track your location (because you allow it to do so) thus allowing you to keep in touch with your friends, and telling them where you are. It works like a GPS. The only benefit I see is that your daddy would at least know where you are, if you're still in possession with your phone by then.

Watch this video clip, and hope you'd make the right move. For me, I'd just stick to what Facebook is meant to be used as - a social networking tool, not a tool to announce my whereabouts every second of the day.

The Price of Technology

Technology helps; technology destroys. Which one would you prefer?

Go to any restaurant and look around you. The place is crowded, yet silent. You see families with kids, yet you don't hear sounds of children whining and crying from the tables around you. Yup, they have been sedated by a new tranquilizer called technology. You see them holding phones and tablet PCs in their hands as they wait for the food to be served. It's not uncommon to see everyone in the family staring at their own handheld devices sending messages, playing games or surfing the Net. What has happened to family interaction? It's quite dead, actually. Mommy doesn't talk to daddy; little boy/girl is in his own world immersed in his "Plants and Zombies" game.

You'll see the same scene at home. Daddy is watching television, mommy is blogging her latest travel adventure, their teenage son is engrossed in Facebooking, oblivious to what is happening in the house. They hardly ever go to the park as a family anymore, have a picnic, talk about anything under the sun. 

Ask any teen about what Merdeka is about, the contributions of former politicians to the nation, the world's population, names of capital cities, the causes of tsunami... chances are, they know nothing much, or nothing at all because all they ever do when given an assignment is copy wholesale and paste into Microsoft Word, ready to be submitted to their teacher a soon as they could. I recently gave my students a topic on how to overcome gangsterism in schools. Guess what?  Even with my assistance, it took them some time to think of the points and elaborations. That's what copying and pasting does to students. 

Sad, huh?

Whypad?

It's not very often that I get a long break. This time, because of Hari Raya and compulsory leave, I got the whole week off, and here I am at my sister's place in KL. The road is still clogged with cars though, if you drive out at peak hours.

The first thing I noticed when I got into my sister's house was the presence of a ubiquitous device - a machine that needs no introduction, a gadget that all 4-year-olds would beg for their next birthday. Yup, it's the iPad. I saw not only one, but three iPads. That's one each for my brother-in-law, one for my sister and one for my 8-year-old niece. They were using it not for work but for playing Smurf, Baking Dash and stuff like that, as well as making full use of its Wifi capability to surf the Internet. I'm not gonna ask if they had actually bought three, but I think I heard my bro-in-law saying that one belonged to his mother who lives just next door.

What's this thing with the iPad that has everyone, from tiny tots to adults, go a gaga? To find out, I got hold of my niece's iPad when she wasn't using it. Well, now I know why this expensive toy is a craze. It's not the price that matters, it's the technology that comes with it that everyone finds irresistible. A capacitive touch screen (just a light touch to activate the icons), crystal clear screen, zooming in and out by "pinching" the screen with your fingers and flipping page-by-page with your index finger. There are plenty of games (mostly paid ones) that could keep a kid silent for hours, giving adults lots of tranquility, and time to do their chores. Yeah, I must admit that I'm hooked to it, but not to the extent of being so highly addictive till I'd forget my meals.

Would I get one myself? As much as I'd like to, I won't. I've already spent a fortune on my credit card and utility bills as well as repaying the house and car loans to finance companies. At over RM1,500  I could have meals, groceries and household needs. With the same amount of money, I'd rather get a brand new LCD television so that I could enjoy some good movies at home, or just save the amount for a rainy day.

Indeed... the iPad is meant for those who could afford it. If you can't, then don't burn a big hole in your pocket just because your kid has been bugging you nuts day in and day out.

Kids, kids, kids.

A: Mom, what's that?
B: That's a tablet PC.
A: Is it an i-Pad?
B: ?? How did you know about i-Pad?
A: My friend has it. He got it for his birthday.
B: Oh ok.
A: Can I have that for my birthday too, mom?
B: No, you can't, A. It's not good for your eyes.
A: But my friend has it and his eyes are ok.
B: Maybe now his eyes are OK, but many years later, his eyesight will be bad.
A: Why mom?
B: That's because the screen gives out radiation, which is bad for the eyes.
A: People must wear glasses when their eyes are bad?
B: Yeah.
A: So, you're wearing glasses because you use i-Pad too?
B: No, mom and dad don't have i-Pads. We don't need one.
A: But i-Pad is so popular now, mom. Friends will laugh at me if I don't have one. Can you buy one, please? Please?
B: OK. You get first place in your final exam, and I'll get you one, ok?

Does this sound familiar to you? Children are not only getting more techno-savvy, they're also getting much more inquisitive and smarter. They know how to weave their way around their parents to get what they want. In order to handle SuperKids like this, parents need to be more cautious when dealing with their kids' demands. The days where we stare at them in anger are gone. They're no longer afraid of us. We can't spank them, we can't scold them. We need to exercise plenty of patience and understanding as to what makes them tick, and that is no easy task.

Kids are indeed getting more difficult to handle, but not impossible.

New Kids

Don't be duped by the title. I'm not having a kid - maybe never will. :-)
What do these have in common?

• iPad
• iPod
• iPhone
• Blackberry
• tablet PC
• android

Well,  these are words that come out of the mouths of kids as young as 5-years-old these days. They know what these gadgets are, they could pronounce them well enough even before they go to kindergarten. Of course, their parents help them, or else they wouldn't know, would they?

Modern kids are techno-savvy, and that's because of the exposure they get when the eat out with their parents. In school, they see their friends play with these gadgets, so they would coax their parents to get one for them. Just ask a kid what they want for Christmas or for their birthdays. Chances are, they'd ask for a digital camera, a handphone or some latest techno stuff in the market. Presents like pencil boxes, school bags, books, Lego and Megablocks have lost their popularity years ago. DUH.... what? Yes, you can say that again.

Is there a way to keep them away from technology till they're old enough to handle them? The answer is a melancholic "No" because parents have to say "Yes" to their kids' demands; they don't want their kids to be left far behind. "No" has suddenly been excluded from the vocabulary of a child born in the 21st century. These are the TechnoKids who have their own Facebook accounts at a young age, and who could teach their ageing parents how this website works. These are the kids who know what a blog is, and own their own blogs.

So what if my kid asks for an iPad, you may ask. Well, they could have all the latest gadgets money can buy, but they'll lose out on finer things in life - like socializing with REAL people in REAL neighbourhoods; learn to be better citizens, and not be too materialistic. To those who could afford to equip their kids with these ridiculously expensive devices which interest the little ones for just a brief moment before these machines are replaced with newer models, well and good. What about those who can't? I have no answer for that. Personally, I'd rather go for moderation, taking the middle path.

We live in a scary world. It is getting scarier by the day. Children are at least 5x smarter than their parents, and are five times as quick to learn new things. Hopefully, this change would create a better world, not destroy it.

The Right Person - my foot!

"Life is not about finding the right person, but creating the right relationship; it's not how we care in the beginning, but how much we care till the very end." - Anonymous.

How many times have we heard people say:

• "I've found the right man."

• "I've not found the right person yet"

The irony is that, although they've finally found the "right" person, there's no guarantee that the relationship will work out just fine. How does one define "right"? Do we look at a person's physical attributes, their personality, or perhaps their wealth, educational level and social status? 

Personally, if you put too much criteria in looking for partner, then in due time, your relationship will go down the drain. Do you know why - because it's just a fallacy; we believe we've found the exact person that fits our criteria, and on that basis, we begin to supposedly care for them. Years (or months) down the road, you then realise that both of you don't seem to care that much anymore. You do things your way, they do things their way. You have tried hard to please your other half and to show that you cared, but you got nothing in return. Instead you took all the blame, you got shot down each time you made a mistake and you might even feel like you're a slave in your own home. You suddenly find yourself in a tight situation - being dominated by a domineering life partner, and feel like you've got yourself a monster. If you're in this situation, then it means you've got your math all wrong from the start.

The right person to be with is the person whom you can care FOR till the end of your life. It takes two to tango. You don't need an astrologer to tell you that. Two people might quarrel every other day but that doesn't necessary mean there's no care, or that you're both a mismatched couple. Arguments happen in the household when there are differences in opinions. Silence is not good. Having a dominating mate isn't an indication that no care would be given or expected either because no two humans are the same. Even twins are not really duplicates of each other. You might initially dislike a person, but over time, care can be displayed in discreet ways. The question is: Can you sustain the care that you give till the end of your lifespan if both of you intend to be together forever more? Can both hands eventually clap?

Charity Begins at Home

You see the piggy bank (picture below) and a stack of money beside it? I call it my Bamboo Bank. The money has been in the container for a few months already, and I've been waiting for the need to use that money. Well, I've just found that need. The contents of my Bamboo Bank will be given to the Japan Quake Relief Fund via World Vision (WV) which I'm a member. Too bad WV doesn't have a branch in little Malacca town, so I've to send a Money Order to its branch in Petaling Jaya instead.



My Bamboo Bank: A bit each day



The money in this container came from two sources. I placed the container on my desk, and I make it a point to put in either 20 sen or 50 sen each day I come to work. Yup, that's my own money. On top of that, 10% of the proceeds of my MUET tuition class goes into the Bamboo Bank too. So far I don't have any more students (sad), so there's nothing much to donate next time. The total amount that I'm sending to the relief fund is RM170.00 (approx. US$50), and that's enough to feed a small family simple meals for a few days.

Notice that the Bamboo Bank that you saw in the picture is specially made. It's made of recyclable material (cardboard and aluminum). This will be my permanent donation box. I got it from Tzu Chi when I attended training there last year. Well, I'm a very passive member... bad boy.

Teach your children to be charitable, but first you need to be charitable, too in order to be a good role model. If those in the lower economic status group could afford to put in small amounts into their own piggy banks each day, I don't see why those in the middle and upper classes can't do so. The Malay has this proverb: "Sedikit, sedikit, lama-lama jadi bukit." (Literally translated: Little by little, eventually it becomes a hill.)" - I'm sure you've heard of that. 

Note: Check out this article, written in 2006/07, before you leave my blog. It really makes you wonder...

Nuclear Programme in Malaysia?

For the past few days, news about the instability of the nuclear reactors in Japan dominated the headlines. The radiation, apparently, is spreading toward United States and Europe. To me, this is really critical. Let's hope for the best and continue praying for the victims.

While people are suffering because of the possibility of a massive nuclear blowout, Malaysia is thinking of having its own nuclear programme. I guess some people at the top think with their backsides. Our former Prime Minister, Dr Mahathir, was probably right when he said that we don't know much about nuclear and fission. Therefore, we can imply that it is not a good idea to have any kind of nuclear programme in this country.

We tend to believe that we will never be hit by natural calamities like tsunami or earthquake because this country is not located within the moving plates of the earth. We forgot that when tsunami struck Acheh a few years back, it hit Penang and some coastal areas too, though the impact wasn't great. We have to remember that the climate has changed, and no one is able to tell what's happening right under our homes.

Malaysia cannot emulate other countries in some areas. There's nothing to prove, but lots to lose if things go wrong. If you're agreeable to have a nuclear plant in Malaysia, then read this local news. If not, then welcome to the no-nuclear club.

On Disasters

Read the papers, listen to the news. What do we see? Sadness, anguish, fear. First it was the massive earthquake, then ferocious tsunami. Disaster has struck Japan real bad, and then the wave hit Hawaii and part of the U.S. Even China felt it. Now there's a threat that the nuclear reactor might be leaky, thus emitting radiation. If I remember correctly, only a few days back I read about a disease threat. Some of my friends are ill, having flu-like symptoms. What does all this mean? 

It means the climate and whatever that is under our feet are changing rapidly but we can't see it till tragedy happens. It also means that this is the time to do your part to help victims of such calamities. You can give financial, spiritual, emotional and physical support. This is the time for philanthropists to help rebuilt cities that have been destroyed, not just donate only to show that you're the founder of an organisation.

It also means you'll receive flyers and newsletters telling you that God is showing his wrath, so you must repent. Others would say it's a sign that Armageddon is near.  I say that you need not worry. The end of the world will come, but not in our lifetime, so please don't bother about what others tell you about 2012 - the year when the end of the world is said to occur. What you must do now is to pray for those in need of your prayers.

Malaysians are lucky not to have to go through this disaster. If our country were to have a disaster, it would be a political one where half-baked politicians incite hatred against the people using the race card as their weapon to retain power. We have seen what had happened (e.g.: calling Malaysian-born Chinese "immigrants", the cow head issue, using the word "Allah" in sermons & newsletters) and is still happening right now. They never will learn, so please vote them out in the next General Election. We used to be a harmonious nation; we don't need disastrous politicians that will do nothing but break this country apart as quickly as tsunami destroyed parts of Japan.

UPDATE:

A volcano, Mount Karangetang in Indonesia has erupted. It is located around Sulawesi.It happened hours after the tsunami in Japan (last week). I don't remember hearing about this in the news, did you?

Powerful Money

One of the issues that lead to marital breakdown is shortage of money. That's right. Couples argue about the lack of financial means to keep the family afloat. Bills have yet to be paid due to insufficient funds, some purchases need to be postponed and meals have to be cut down to only once or twice a day. I'm not pointing fingers at any particular reason, but one thing's for sure - if I'm not careful, I'd be in the same predicament though it will not reach melting point unless I get thrown out of the company I work for.

There is a saying: "Money is not everything; money is not the most important thing in the world."

While that is true, we need to be realistic. We don't wear dried leaves as our clothing or use stones as knives anymore, do we? The days of the Flintstones are long gone. We don't pluck copper coins from money trees. We have to earn every single penny to feed ourselves, and if we have a family, or intend to do so, we need to earn even more to cater to the needs of our wife and children (and parents/parents-in-law). Money is so important that without it, getting married is impossible. It is so vital that if you lose money through mismanagement of funds - not through foolishness like gambling - you'll might lose your loved ones.

In the family institution, men are always looked upon as the "Money God" as they are responsible for ensuring that everyone has their basic needs looked into - clothes, food, shelter and education. For this reason, it is my personal belief that even if a woman earns enough salary for the family, she would still dump her other half if he's out of job or can't seem to bring in additional funds so that the family could enjoy some extra comfort and entertainment. Of course, you cannot deny that there are non-working moms who could just depend on their husbands for financial support, and they both don't mind about it as there is mutual agreement;  there are also non-working dads in the same scenario, but how many are THAT fortunate?

The reality is, the minute you mention that you're running out of cash, your other half sees a red flag. If you're married, there will be discussions on how to improve your financial standing. If you're in a relationship, chances are, the other half would just give you a final kiss if the situation remains status quo, pack up the belongings and leave you for greener pastures.

That's how powerful money is...  so, if you're in financial distress, get some help - not from loan sharks, but from a professional fund manager, or if you cannot trust them, just discuss with your partner how to get over the financial difficulty. There will definitely be sacrifices that both of you (and your children) have to make, but unless you're born into a wealthy family, you have no choice.

I don't want to run out of money, I don't want to lose my loved one, and I don't want to be insane. Now let's see... where can I get part time job at this age, huh?

Horrified with Relationships

If you've been in just one relationship, and marry that person in the end, then you're really a lucky person. In reality, this doesn't happen to many of us who have had at least two relationships prior to getting hitched for good. Some never make it despite dating numerous times, and they become singles for life.

It's tough. Being in a relationship, to me, is somewhat like walking in the jungle without a guide. The scene is fresh, the sights are beautiful, the water is pristine and the air is clean. However, you don't know if you're going into the direction that leads you out into the open. Some will be trapped forever, thus will never be able to find their way out. What's worse is that along the way, you find a person who presumably is a guide, follows you, tells you where to go but just when you start having confidence that the guide is your ultimate saviour, there's a distraction from a pretty sight, the guide bids farewell and leaves you without a trace.

That is an analogy of a relationship. You find someone you truly love, do things together, share jokes and problems, but somewhere along the romantic path, this same person finds another partner and tells you to go away. Let's be more explicit. You allow your partner to go on a trip, assuring yourself that your partner is in good hands and that things will remain status quo. In fact, there is nothing to be concerned about as both of you have been in love for months. Alas, while on the plane, your partner gets attracted to one of the passengers. When your partner returns, you find a change. There is not much communication going on, lesser fun, far lesser bedroom activities and more arguments. It makes you wonder why you let this person take that trip in the first place. Imagine seeing a text message that reads: "Hi, we need to talk when I get home." - and it is sent on another flight with another person.

Ouch!! I'm hurt. Are you?



Back in Facebook

I was down in the dumps for over 24 hours two days ago, and within that period, I deactivated my Facebook account as I was so frustrated about everything, and I didn't want to share my problems with others because they could be judgemental or they could just scoff at the comments that I make.

Somehow, I also realise that when there is no place to vent that same emotional "outburst", and when there's no one around whom you could talk to, I had to reactivate the account, and I'm grateful that Facebook doesn't permanently delete users' accounts without the latter's written authorization.

In Freddy Krueger's words: "I'm baaaack!"

Time to Go Home

The past four decades have taught me just too many things from the good and bad experiences that I've had. The good experiences will be kept close to me even when I'm gone. Unfortunately, the bad experiences keep recurring, I'm unable to uphold morality, thus bringing shame to everyone who are close to me or causing stress to my loved ones - family, friends and relatives.

I would like to thank everyone, especially this particular person, for being there when I was in deep trouble. Thanks, for lending an ear without fail the past 12 months or so, and for lifting my mood when I was down. However, I've disappointed you repeatedly as a friend and I beg for forgiveness,

Thanks to all those who have read / been reading my posts without fail. It is you who have encouraged me to keep blogging till today... but now it's time to leave. Leave everything.

God bless everyone.

Just Some Garbage Stuff

I've not blogged in a long time out of sheer laziness, and plain numbness of my mental faculty. Those who follow my posts regularly will find that most of my posts have melancholic and solemn tones. Today's post is no different because I've nothing exciting to share but lots of emptiness to pour.

Everywhere I go, I observe people - the elderly smiling and spending their remaining years with friends. I see teens half-embracing and attempting to smooch in a secluded corner of a shopping mall but couldn't out of shyness. I see married couples arguing then reconciling. I see people spending like nobody's business each time there's a big sale and going home gleefully with armfuls of shopping goodies.

Don't they have anything to worry about? I guess they do, but they just discard them temporarily, or perhaps they're reached Nirvana or enlightenment, so nothing at all bothers them.

I don't know what I'm talking about here, but I do know that I'd like to go to sleep now without having to worry about what is gonna happen tomorrow (and the next), and without stressing people out.

Research: To Do or Not to Do

Doctors do research to look for cures for illnesses. Engineers do research to see if they could come up with safer designs for buildings. Teachers also need to do research to look for ways to enhance learning. But what about something more specific like language teachers? What are they researching for?

Over the past years, local universities are so crazy about doing researches, not realising that in the social science field, it is tough to come up with research that is niche. Social science people are unlike those in the pure science and engineering field where there are too many things to discover and too many new inventions that could be made. Why do universities keep pushing their staff to do research when sometimes there's hardly anything to research on? Why can't these academicians do what they do best - impart knowledge, which should be paramount, rather than unwillingly dwell into research? Yes, research does contribute to acquisition of new knowledge, but can everyone do research? And if an academic staff doesn't do research, does that mean they're inadequate, inefficient and less knowledgeable, therefore do not deserve good annual appraisals or salary increments?

I'm not against doing research, but making research compulsory for all staff in order to fulfill a university's Key Performance Indicators (KPI), is not a good way to encourage research, for the focus will be on meeting the KPI rather than the purpose, outcome and value of the research to the institution, community or nation. Could the research culture be forced into unwilling researchers this way? I've done a research when I did my masters' (still at it), and I can tell you that it is not easy, and not everyone is cut out to be a researcher. I find it tough to analyze results and to synthesize articles that I read for my research, and that's why it is taking me so long to complete my thesis, if I ever complete it.

Anyone who aspires to be a researcher - even an amateur one - firstly needs to love reading, and have interest in an area of research. Then he also needs to have an analytical mind or else it would be very difficult to synthesize articles, use the correct instruments, report findings and make recommendations. Forcing anyone to do a research would possibly lead to plagiarism, and result in half-baked efforts.

So, what would you want to research on? How would you go about it?

Slow Drivers

How fast can you drive? 80km/h? 160km/h? Does speed matter? To a certain extent, speed does matter if you're in a hurry to reach your destination. On a freeway, you could drive 160km/h or more though the speed limit is a mere 110 km/h in our country. You'll still arrive in one piece provided your car tires and engine are in top condition, and your driving skills is 9 out of 10.

However, not everyone is able to handle that kind of adrenaline rush. This does not make them a sissy. I believe there are many tortoises out there who are careful drivers, and they're slow because they want to be safe, and they want their passengers and other drivers on the road to be safe too. On the other hand, driving at a snail's pace on a freeway is a bit too much because freeways are not built for extremely slow drivers.

People drive super fast because they like the thrill of having the adrenaline pumping through their heads and feeling good when they arrive at their destination. Others don't want the thrill, but the enjoyment of cruising along at a constant speed. If you're in a hurry, well... drive a little faster but just be sure that you're careful.

If a driver drives slow and you push them to go faster, chances are, you might not arrive your destination in one piece. Slow or fast, drive safely - that's what matters most.

A Reason for Everything

There is an explanation for everything. Or is there? As far as I'm concerned, things happen for a reason, and we do not need to know the reason for it to happen because we won't until you see the outcome. Then all of a sudden, it strikes you: "Oh, now I see why it happens."

Scenario 1:

You've been working in Company A for a long time as a junior executive. One fine day, you were told of a Voluntary Separation Scheme (VSS) and before you know it, you're out of job. You're severely depressed and wonder why must it be you. You look high and low, and finally secure a new job. While in this new firm, you not only got promoted quickly to a manager but also got yourself a life partner.

Scenario 2:

You're in a relationship with a great man, and you believe things will work out well. Then he meets a new colleague, goes out with her a couple of times. Before long, he tells you that he's moving out of your life as he's found the one he truly loves. You wonder, you've loved him so dearly and cared immensely for him, why is he betraying you? To get away from it all, you run to another State so that your mind does not think too much of the excruciating pain of being dumped. You get support from your new colleagues there and you finally find true love.

Scenario 3:

You're on the verge of filing for mutual divorce. One day, he calls you and informs that his mother is very ill and asks you for help. You agree but you were adamant that will not change your mind about the divorce as you'd been so tired of his attitude. On the day you visit his mom, he is there by her bedside. You chat with him and his mom. Then his mom asks you to forgive him and give him another chance to change. You give it a thought. You feel sorry for being so silly. You reminisce the good times you had with him, and you don't want your child to suffer as a result of the divorce. In the end, you shred the papers and return to his arms. Can you explain that?

Things like this happen again and again and again... someone will be hurt; someone will be happy.

From Being Homeless to Having a Good Job

I came across this video yesterday. It showed this homeless unkempt man trying to make a living off the streets. But then, just 24-hours later, things changed for him... when I saw his transformation this morning, I smiled. I was so happy for him - happy that someone out there heard him and helped him. I just wonder if such things have happened, or will ever happen in this country.

God bless Ted Williams. He'll do good from now on.

What Do Women Want, ah?

They want the 3Cs and the 5Cs - horrors!!! That's so cliche....

While it is true that there are some women who look for the "Cs", in general, I believe that most don't. There's no specific list as to what they actually want from you as each woman's want is different. As an individual, you have to make a study of the woman you are attracted to, and learn what makes them tick. Let me give you a list of what I believe women want from men. I call it the 3Cs and 3Rs:

My 3Cs

• Caring (not only when she's sick)
• Courageous (not only to protect them from criminals)
• Committed (not just a touch and go relationship)

My 3Rs

• Respectful (mutual, not one-sided)
• Real love (not love for lust or beauty)
• Responsible (not running away when things go wrong)

Notice that I didn't say anything about money and beauty because money can be earned if you know how, and beauty is only temporary.

So, good luck if you're looking for a woman now. :-)

Chinese New Year Already???

Well, Christmas is supposed to last 12 days. Remember the song "The 12 Days of Christmas"? - or at least till 31 Dec. 2010 but what I saw at a local shopping mall yesterday pissed me off.

Chinese New Year deco on the ceiling

Chinese New Year greeting at the entrance!

I'm not a devout Christian, and I have never celebrated Christmas except this year. What I want to know is why the hell has this shopping centre begun putting up Chinese New Year (CNY) decorations and greetings when the festival is on 3 Feb. 2011? That's nearly 2 months ahead of time. Where is the respect for Christmas? Can't they wait till a week later to start their massive CNY promotions?

The same thing happens with other festivals. Our festive seasons are now highly commercialised that they have lost their true meaning and value, no thanks to such ignorant acts. Festivals equals major shopping spree at great discounts.

This is not the 1-Malaysia that we want. In fact, this has nothing to do with 1-Malaysia at all but has everything to do with profit-making.