Now I Know Who They Were

I've never thought I'd do this, but I did it yesterday. My parents wanted to visit a relative, and I took this opportunity to bring my camera along so that I could take shots of days gone by. I've been to her extra long colonial house since I was a little kid, and I've been intrigue by some of the photos I saw hanging on the plastered walls. The condition of the black and white photos have not changed a bit. I got to know that those are photos of my ancestors, whose relationship to me and names I never knew - or probably have forgotten - till a couple of days ago. Here are the photos:

Great Grandfather
Mr Chua Lip Tay

Great Grandmother
Mrs Ong Him Neo

Great-Great Grandmother
Mrs Lim Heng Neo

Grand Uncles

You'll see a bit of reflection on each photo as I dare not climb a chair or take them down in case something unfortunate happens. These are some of my relative's personal memorabilia not to be seen elsewhere. The photo of my grand uncles was originally taken in 1933 during the Wangkang Festival. Since there was no colour film at that time, each photo was hand-coloured. That's just amazing.

Well, I'm proud to say that I now know who my ancestors are though I still don't know what they did or how they had contributed to the Peranakans or Straits-born community. Maybe one day, I'll find out... yeah, one day.

I'm on a Diet with a Difference

OK, I've to admit it. I'm concerned about my weight - very concerned. Therefore, I'm going on a diet BUT with a difference. I need to stuff myself with food because I'm LOSING weight. Well, the amount of weight loss isn't too great but I'm having trouble putting on my pants because it keeps falling off even with a belt, and there's nothing nice to see behind the pants... I think I need to add between 5-10kg to my current weight to look nice.... hey, wait! Am I vain? No, I'm not. Men wanna look nice too.

I was very scrawny as a teen. When I started work, I put on a bit of weight, but when I came back to Malacca, I lost those hard-earned pounds. It took me years just to gain 4kg!!! Then I got married, and in the three years of marriage, I put on more weight, and the scale almost hit 70kg. from a mere 59kg, which is good to me. That didn't last long, though. Almost immediately after the divorce, I failed to maintain weight. It kept sliding downward. It has been 8 months since it happened, and I'm now down to 64kg. My height is 175 cm., and if the calculation is correct, the weight is still within the normal range.

To some of you, this little weight loss is absolutely nothing to be anxious about (I hope), and I know that stuffing myself with junk food and fast food is not a good way to increase weight. My appetite has been good; so has my ability to sleep. I don't know if it is my work, lack of happiness or something else that has been stopping me from gaining weight again.

I will never be overly depressed with this weight loss, yet I know if it keeps dropping, something must be wrong. Perhaps I need a change of diet... and a wife to cook nutritious home-cooked food for me. Maybe I should just go work in a restaurant instead of teaching. I want to add a little more flesh.

Long Holiday...what to do ah?

The office was deserted today as many Muslim employees have started their Aidil Fitri leave. So I took the opportunity to sneak out of the office early - I hope my boss isn't reading this. I'm not working for the next TEN days - that's right... 10 days of holidays partially because we were forced to take 3 days off. The rest are special holidays and weekends. I'll start work on ... on.... err... well, who cares? I can't remember but I know it's a Monday. So what am I gonna do?

I don't know. Perhaps I'll continue blogging regularly for 10 days, or rejuvenate my interest in photography. My poor Canon DSLR has been gathering dust in the cupboard for months already because I've been busy with classes, and I leave it at my mom's place most of the time... sigh. What a bloody waste of money; there are people who want one, yet they couldn't afford to own one.

How about travelling? Nah, I don't travel alone. It's no fun travelling without someone you love. Somehow, I'm not a lone traveller.

So what am I gonna do for 10 days? If I blog about it, that means I'm doing something; if I don't, that means I'll spend a lot of time sleeping and being a couch potato.

What to Do?

Last night, I prayed for a sunny morning as I wanted to cut the grass. It had been raining; the weather has been unpredictable in recent months. This morning, the sky appeared gloomy but God answered my prayers, the sun shone brightly by 8:00 AM as I was having breakfast at the mamak stall eating my favourite roti canai and drinking fresh cow's milk.

I didn't waste my time getting the grass cutter. As I was cutting the grass, I saw my neighbour. We exchanged greetings.

"Good morning, holiday ah?", the neighbour asked.

"No, I'm on leave - yesterday and today."

"Your wife working?", he said with a smile. He and my ex-wife are colleagues but in different faculties.

I sheepishly replied, "We're separated already."

My neighbour was stumped. "What do you mean separated?"

"We're divorced." Short and straight to the point.

"Ah?? What happened??" he exclaimed. Can't blame his ignorance as he's seldom at home till lately.

I shrugged my shoulders. What more could I answer?

"But... her parents came the other day right?" - he was still in a state of disbelief.

"If recently, those were my parents. If it's long ago, probably hers."

"So now you stay alone?" he asked. Yes, I don't have another woman in my life.

He shook his head. "So sorry..." - and there was a pause. "Sad la," he countinued as he looked at me. "Nowadays, things are different..."

I looked at him. "Yeah..." that's all I could utter. Then he continued with his work. As he turned around, I heard him repeat to himself, "Sad la".

I continued cutting my grass thinking of our conversation.  Each time someone asks me "What happened?" I just could not respond as I'm partially to be blamed too. As the blade of the machine rotated, I kept asking myself why on earth this is happening to me.

After the divorce, I live alone - except on weekends - while my ex-wife lives with her parents every single day about 300 meters away. Other neighbours could testify that I don't bring women home. Strangers have eyes to see that each time I go out, I'm alone unless a colleague wants to have lunch or dinner with me, which very rarely happens. Go ask any pub owner and see if they've ever seen me before. I'm made to look like the state's No.1 criminal... well, maybe I'm a criminal in the making - damn me.

I'm trying to be happy but each time someone asks that question, I'll reminisce and feel sad. I've lost a wife,  I only have me. Each day I pray that I've enough strength to live on, and live with the fact that there will still be questions like "What happened" and "Do you still keep in touch with her?" till it's time to leave this world; it doesn't matter if I remarry or not.

I finished cutting the grass in an hour or so.

"Hello!" the neighbour called again.

He handed me some mangoes. He plants a mango tree in his garden.  He is an Indian, and to the Hindus, mango leaves are hung above the door frame for blessings. I guess he felt sad for me but grateful that he has a family. Perhaps this kind gift also symbolises blessings that Mr. Siva, my neighbour, is passing on to me.

Thanks, Mr Siva. I need all the blessings I can get... and may God bless you and your family too.

Transformers 3 in Production!

I love three types of movies - science fiction (sci-fi), comedy and animated. One of my favourite movies is Transformers. I've watched both series, and you know what? Transformers 3 is now in production, and is expected to be released in July 2011 (seriously), and in 3D. There are lots of fake trailers out there, but they're all very creative. I wonder why Michael Bay doesn't sue YouTube? Well, it's alright - it's for everyone's entertainment I guess :)

Here's a sneak preview of some of the vehicles taken by a bystander who had been waiting for the cars to appear.

This is REAL footage (taken by a bystander)

This is the FAKE but creative trailer




The official trailer is not out yet.

New vehicles, new transformation, new enemies - and hopefully more exciting than the previous ones. In terms of storyline, well ... I wouldn't expect anything to change. It would just be good against evil, and rescueing a skimpily clothed damsel in distress.

Bye-bye Students

Do you remember the time when you had a class party at the end of the year to celebrate the completion of you studies, and to move on to the next level? Well, I completed my school years long, long ago. However, today is my last day TEACHING my present students in this campus. After 13 weeks of sweat and challenges, I can finally raise my hand in jubilation that I've taught them in the best way I could.

I thanked my students for being good, and I apologised to them if I've said or done anything wrong. Well, they truly appreciated my gesture. In fact, they were sad to see me leave. I told them I'm not coming back, which is true, because I have been on loan for this semester. I shall be based in Malacca again next semester onward.

"Teacher, am I good?" one student asked.

"No, you're sometimes naughty, sometimes bad." -  I said with a little smile. My international students didn't know what "naughty" meant - poor kids. I must've been a bad teacher.

"Teacher, I like you." - this kid said .. and he has always been the noisiest one in class. Well, that's sweet, thanks. We're talking about 18-19 year old kids who have come from another country to study here. The other group of students are mostly adults from age 19-40 years old, many doing their postgraduate studies.

Surprisingly, I've remained rather calm throughout the 13 weeks despite the teenage students' antics and mischief. With the exception of one or two loud outbursts, things went very well.

Am I gonna miss them? Sigh... yeah I will, but I'm not coming back here. It's just too tiring.

Early Festive Invitation

It is now Ramadhan - the fasting month, and Muslims will celebrate Hari Raya Aidil Fitri at the end of the month. With just over a week away, the mood has already started. Festive songs are played in the administrative office, and paraphernalias linked to this festival have started to appear in towns.

This morning, a cleaner came into my office. She normally comes with another cleaner, and she has always been the quiet and sultry one. However, this morning was different.  She came in first, and as she was sweeping the floor, she said with a cheer: "Raya bawak rumah eh, cikgu? (Come to my house on Hari Raya, teacher)" - I asked her where she lives and so on.  

It was a pleasant surprise to receive this invitation. I doubt I'll go to the cleaner's house as I'm generally a shy person and I would totally stay away from strangers. Nevertheless, her invitation was meaningful to me. Malaysians are generally very hospitable.

I guess ... there's no place like home - with warts and all.