What Luck!

People don't believe in astrology, numerology, palmistry and geomancy. They don't believe there's such a thing as luck; they don't believe that our lives have already been pre-determined at birth, therefore you can't change it, but along the way, there's something called luck. Watch this video. He's unemployed for 18 months, walks into a McDonald to order his food, something caught his eye, then he became an instant millionaire. And he doesn't even play lotto or buy Magnum 4D regularly. How would you explain this phenomena if it's not luck?

Luck plays a part in our lives. If you have a loving family who understands your needs, that's luck. If you have a job which pays your bills, that's luck also. You're promoted though others are more senior than you - that's luck with hard work. Out of nowhere, a nice girl comes along and you two start dating. Isn't that luck, too?  Then there are people who keep having strings of good luck, so what? They were born under the lucky stars, I suppose.

There's nothing to be jealous about when people have luck. You have your own too. You don't have to rob other people's happiness as a result of their good luck just because you cannot enjoy the same.

You are LUCKY enough to be born, and to live in this generally peaceful country, not in a war-torn, poverty-stricken and calamity-prone one. Forget those recalcitrant politicians. :-)

First Time Christmas!

Christmas is just a week away, but I've already started celebrating - my first ever Christmas celebration in my entire life. I invited a few of my colleagues to my mini party. We had a gift exchange too. Well, I've to thank someone for making it a special event. Here are some photos taken on that night.

The door deco - simple but symbolic

My first Christmas tree - minus the snow

My friends: truly 1-Malaysians (Malay, Chinese, Indian)

Ze Cuisine - glorious food. Pot luck style.

Presents for everyone

The whole spread

Pretty baubles

Not champaign, but apple juice

It was a memorable night... hopefully, it won't be the last. Looking at how things go, I don't think it will. Thank you God. :-)

I Celebrate What, ah?

A few minutes ago, I met my boss at the elevator and the first question she asked me was: "Are you celebrating Christmas?"

Err... gee. It's kinda tough to give an immediate response because those who know my story also know that I went back to church - yeah, went BACK - only recently. Therefore, I'm not a Christian yet. Nevertheless, the answer I gave my boss was: "Yes... and Chinese New Year too." because I'll continue going to church.

Apparently, she was told that I'm involved in a Christmas celebration, and she thought that anyone (born in Malaysia) with an English name, by default, celebrates Christmas. Boy... was she wrong! I told her that some parents prefer giving English names to their children so that it's easier just to call by that name. You know how long and difficult some Chinese names can be sometimes, don't you? The other reason (which I didn't mention) is that some people have English names just to be glamorous, or want to be in the same "league" as their idols. These names don't normally appear in their identification card.

So, yes... I'm celebrating Christmas from 2010 onward... and Chinese New Year, too.

Well, now that's cleared. :-)

I Love You is Hard to Say

I was reading a fellow blogger's post recently, and I've this big question in my thick head. Is it so hard for us to say "I love you"? Oh no..., we can say it effortlessly to our girlfriend and boyfriend, but we can't seem to force it out of our mouths and say the same to our parents (or even to our spouses). In the same light, our parents don't know how to verbalize the THREE words.

My conclusion is simple: Most Asian families are not accustomed to being expressive in terms of showing their love to their offspring, but they certainly are expressive in an argument. It is still so damn bloody hard for me to say the word "LOVE" to my mom and dad as I feel so bloody awkward, but deep in my heart I know I love my parents though I do not explicitly show it to them by verbalizing it.

On the day my ex-wife's parents announced the divorce to my parents (we were both present), my dad gave me an earfull when the other party left, but he was kinda sympathetic. I felt so bloody guilty, I stood there and said to him: "Can I give you a hug?" My dad was speechless, he nodded his head, and I hugged BOTH my parents. Of course when that happened, my ex-wife and her parents were long gone. I have never given any of them a hug in my four decades of existence, and it took something so drastic to happen for me to do it. Yet, I still don't feel "nice" if I were to go home each day and hug them, so I don't do it. I want to, but I can't. Try as much as I can, I still can't.

Is it a sin? To me, it is not. Sometimes, what matters is not your action, but the content of your mind at the point of action. Do you really mean it?

I'm not putting the blame on anyone here, but if one day - if that day ever comes - I remarry and have a kid, I pray hard that I'll be a better parent, educate my child so that he/she not only loves, but know how to say "I love you" and mean it from the bottom of the heart.



Christmas?

Look at the picture below, and guess where it was taken.

This is not London

No, it wasn't taken abroad. Instead the photo was taken in a renown shopping mall  where  I went  a couple of days back. Those who have been there know where it is. In fact, any shopping mall you go to, you'll see lavish Christmas decos. Besides listening to songs, and admiring the ornaments on the trees (now they come in three colours - orange, green and white), I wonder what else Malaysians know about Christmas.

Not everyone can celebrate Christmas, but everyone can take part in the celebration. There is a difference. Regardless of what race you belong to, you should know why you celebrate your festival, and why others celebrate theirs too. Don't let shopping centres educate you, because they don't.

In the meantime, just enjoy the celebration and pray for continuous peace and prosperity in this country.

Woozy and Queasy

Today isn't a good day for me. I woke up feeling queasy, and dizzy. It wasn't a joke when I felt it; I don't remember when I last felt this weird. There was headache, and my eyes could hardly open. Yet, I had to force my reluctant feet to walk and teach the 8:00AM class.

No, I'm not pregnant. I went to the restroom twice this morning. The second time was really a bad one. No need to describe the shitty details as it's gross. I don't remember eating anything wrong last night or even this morning. It could possibly be due to exhaustion of "running" around town and out of town recently - yeah, age is catching up on me, but maybe it's just an excuse. I don't know.

Breakfast is usually quite heavy, but this morning just ate a bit. I didn't even order a glass of plain water as I normally would. Somehow, there's just no appetite. Maybe I should just go home and rest, and later come back for the 2:00PM class - nah... next time i'd just bring a pillow and a bed spread, lock my office door and snooze. That would be cool, huh.

It has been 4 hours since waking up at 6:00AM, and I still feel woozy and queasy.

What Kind of Relationship?

How long can a marriage last? Some of us have a delightfully happy marriage (you're blessed), some have a rocky one, while others have ended theirs. When a marriage fails, the blame falls on incompatibility. Maybe, but that's not always true and that's not the main reason. Personally, if you want your marriage to work, you need to have a really good relationship with your partner from Day 1. You need to work hard.

If you expect your spouse or partner to be there for you all the time, but you do not reciprocate, then your relationship with them will go downhill real quick. Men often believe that when they're into a relationship, all attention must go to them; well, if you have that kind of mentality, it's time to change because in a relationship, you'll need two hands to clap, and these hands have to continue clapping till the end of time. To be fair, it goes the same way with women too.

If you assume that life is so simple that you could just let your partner go any time you don't need them or when you're sick of them, then you're sadly wrong, too. It takes a long time to build a relationship. An everlasting relationship constitutes a continuous act of getting to know each other - it just doesn't stop when you're married - it goes on. Therefore, don't just let a fish go if you believe it is very precious to you just because there are tonnes of other fishes in the ocean that you could choose from. It is sometimes the ugly fish that could sometimes give you the best taste (but it depends on how you cook it, too).

Don't you ever believe that if you want to have a successful relationship, both need to have some common interests. Well, in my personal point of view, that's a biased statement. Two people can have many opposing opinions, likes and dislikes, and attitudes yet get along very well till all eternity. For instance, you could be a doctor, and your partner could be an administrative clerk. If you could just let go of your status-consciousness and egoism, and focus on building your communication and relationship instead, then sparks will fly. There are also sacrifices to be made - and both parties need to do that. If either one is egoistic and chauvinistic all the time, then the relationship will eventually crumble.

And yes, some people are just not meant to be with each other. I can't deny that. No matter how hard you both try, there's simply no chemistry. Then, the relationship has to be platonic.